Monday, July 31, 2006

Leonard Nimoy's 'The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins'

William Shatner's idiosyncratic interpretation of "Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds"

Saturday, July 29, 2006

For the glory of the Empire!


Named after the Klingon equivalent of Heaven - or Valhalla to be more precise - Stovokor are an American death metal band that dress up and sing in Klingon, no less. However, to the unititiated most death metal bands probably sound like they're singing in Klingon anyway.

I wonder if there are any other Star Trek-themed bands out there? I don't just mean that annoying song by The Firm - not to be confused with Jimmy Page's group - that I liked when I was 11. "Star Trekin' across the universe..."

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Onward Christian soldiers!


While flicking through the channels on my tellybox, I came across the Knights of St. Michael on the Eternal World Television Network (EWTN), a Catholic television network from the US. While I would normally steer well clear of stations like this, I was somehow drawn to these fresh faced, clean-cut youths who want to fight the good fight.

Here's the blurb on their page on the EWTN website:

"This Catholic variety show features a cast of eleven young adults who teach our Catechism in whole new way! This new series will leave you feeling encouraged and proud to be Catholic! The Knights have found themselves compelled to choose a side... fighting for God beneath his first defender, Saint Michael. These young defenders of the faith stand in the front line of the spiritual battle - and they are champions".

One segment involved these warriors of Christ reading out letters from viewers from all across Christendom. Most of the letters were from various parts of America - a lot were from Michigan for some reason - however, there were a number from other parts of the globe, including good old County Mayo. While one Crusader read out the letter, another would struggle to find that place on a globe that they had. One letter was from Norway, so Tammy - I didn't catch her name, but she looked like a Tammy - uttered the immortal words, "Where's Norway?" Priceless.

The letters consisted mostly of the our good Christians doing good deeds and leading a good Catholic life to which the Knights would respond, "Cool!" and, "Great!" For example, the viewer from Mayo has said the Rosary every day since the age of 9 - she's now 13 - and another babysitted (babysat?) their younger siblings, so that her parents could go to Mass. All very admirable. However, one letter was more than a little sinister. This avenging angel and her little sister (from Michigan, no less) had set up a lemonade stall and decided to donate all the proceeds to pro-life groups in order to save the unborn! Tammy and co. thought that was cool and great. Frightening.

Perhaps next week, we'll hear about someone flagellating themselves or a bookburning of blasphemous material somewhere. We might even see the launch by the Knights of the Tenth Crusade to rid the Holy Land of the Jewish and Muslim infidels. While they're at it, they may as well exterminate their auld enemy, the Protestants. Their rotting, crucified corpses would line the road from Rome to Jerusalem, and their unbaptised souls would rot in Hell forever. Wouldn't that be cool and great?

Thursday, July 20, 2006

A painful lesson

Today I got my vaccinations for my forthcoming trip to Thailand. I was given two shots in the arm, which should protect me from a host of nasty diseases, such as typhoid, tetanus and Hepatitus A and B. My arms are a little tender, but the €150 I had to pay has hurt a lot more! I could have flown to Manchester - for a lot less than €150 - and seen my old GP and got the shots for nothing, courtesy of the much maligned NHS. That's exactly what Clare did. The clever girl.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

“Have a nice life!”

I’ve had this said to me three times when saying goodbye, usually for the last time, to someone I didn’t know that well, but well enough. I was taken aback each time. They weren’t even being facetious. How fucking dare they! I think it is rude, arrogant and dismissive. Did I mean so little to them? I hate people like that. Even if you think you’ll never see that person again, you don’t say something like that. I’ll headbutt à la Zidane the next person that says that to me. Cunts.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

A walk in the park

Today Clare and I went for a walk in Albert College Park near where we live. I'm ashamed to say, but we have lived in Glasnevin for over seven months and it was the first time we had gone in. I've walked past it hundreds of times on my way back from the gym or DCU. It's not the biggest park I ever been in, but it was great to get away from all the noise and traffic. It always amazes me to think that one can imagine being in the countryside when one is still in the city. We even came across some tennis courts which appear to be open to the public and free of charge. Neither of us particularly like the game, but there is something appealing about playing it for nothing out in the open. It was great just going for a leisurely stroll and watching all the other people enjoying it too.

Get fucked Brazil!


I know it may sound spiteful, but I'm glad Brazil have been knocked out. Merci, France! I've never been a fan of theirs. OK, I'll admit that the 1970 World Cup winning team of Pelé, Jairzinho and Carlos Alberto, and the 1980s team which included Zico and Socrates were great and played an attractive, attacking style of football. However, I think they have dined out on that reputation. They bored their way to the title in 1994 (winning it on penalties) and won it four years ago without facing any serious opposition (beating a terrible German side in the final). Also, I can't stand that goofy twat Ronaldinho or the tubby, gap-toothed Ronaldo.

They entered this year's World Cup as hot favourites and everyone was practically salivating when they were about to play their first match against Croatia. Did they deliver? No. They narrowly beat them 1-0 thanks to a fine goal by Kaká. I also thought they were fortunate to beat Australia. They beat Japan in their last group match, but let's face it, Japan are shit. A 3-0 victory in their second round clash with Ghana flattered them greatly. But for some poor finishing by the West Africans, the game would have been a lot closer.

And so to the quarter-final against France. They were poor. Both Ronaldo and Ronaldinho were anonymous, particularly the latter. From what I remember, Barthez only had one save to make. In the second half, Thierry Henry met a superb cross by Zinedine Zidane to sidefoot the ball into the net to give France the victory.

This match showed Brazil for what they really are: average. They are nothing like their predecessors, but instead are a bunch of overpaid, arrogant cockfarmers - thanks, Ian - that think they just have to show up to win a game. I hate the way everyone adopts them as their favourite team because they play 'great football'. No they do not. They have won the World Cup five times, so it's time to give someone else a chance, although three of the four semi-finalists have already won it, so now I guess I'll have to support Portugal!

Strong stuff, I know, but I just had to get this one off my chest.